Member-only story
Royal Blood
A mystery
“Ow!” I cringed in the mirror. “Motherf — “
“Language Miss,” Natalia scolded. She continued to tease my hair to the high heavens before I could adjust my tiara.
“Aren’t we done yet?” I moaned. What Natalia delivered in pain, I liked to pay in attitude. For the last two days I knew nothing but pain. Pain and vanity of the highest degree. High heels, bikini waxes, bleached hair, spray tan, enough product to achieve the plastic face of a Malibu Barbie. I’d light a cigarette if my head weren’t being showered with hairspray.
“Do you want to make an impression or not dear?” she said.
“Not as much as I’d like a cheeseburger,” I muttered.
“Fifteen minutes your majesty!” exclaimed Anastasia. My other lady in waiting brought me my steaming cup of herbal tea.
“It tastes like a hot sock,” I mumbled.
“Drink, you need your strength,” she chimed in her usual upbeat voice.
“God knows it’s all I’ve consumed in the past twelve hours,”
“Drink,” Natalia ordered. She applied my plum lipstick to her own perfectly lined lips.
Yes, I’m a legit princess. I have the tiara, the palace, the ladies and the emotional baggage to prove it. Until that evening, my life was a scripted, planned…
